Ode To The Yidda Guy

Today is my birthday! The sun is intense today. What I really want to do is go to the beach, but there is so much to do: chores, planting, play practice, chores, Will's game. All really good things, but what I really want to do is go to the beach today.

It is about 2:30 in the pm. I am heading over to Will's baseball game. He's gonna get a hit today I can feel it. On the way I think of my brother so I give him a call. He answers, "Hey, how are you, I was going to give you a call. How is it going?"

"All is good, but I was wondering if you would want to go to the beach for an evening swim."

"You know I was going to call you with that exact suggestion."

"Really?" I say, smiling! "Great, let's call back after our kids are done." You know I don't know if he really means it, or if he was just pacifying me and being supportive, but whatever the reason I know he loves me.

My baby brother was my first playmate,
my anchor,
my chess mate,
my competitor,
my project,
my sledding buddy,
my bouy,
my practical joker,
my first best friend.

later that day, I get a call from Rob, it is about 4:30. "What's going on?" He is tired, I can hear it in his voice. "I came home to get the girls ready and then fell on my bed." I know he would love to take a nap. He usually gets up at 4:30 in the morning to get to his job. He doesn't get much time to just rest.

"I am just waiting to find out who wants to go with me." I am referring to the beach. "Do you still want to go?"

"Oh yeah!" he says enthusiastically. "I got my wetsuit! Do you have yours? The girl are excited, We're going."
I don't know if he really wanted to. I know he would have enjoyed staying there in that incline position after watching games, and attending team parties, but he made me feel like he wanted to. He made me feel loved.

We meet up at the 91 and head further west. We talk as the girls giggle in the back. He tells me about Elyse's game, I tell about Will's. We talk about religion, faith, lessons of life, he listens to me. I feel loved.

As we approach the beach, the sun's warmth is stifled by the clouds. We get out of the car and head down to the beach. The girls run, we saunter talking all the while. There is no sun, but the rays that escape the bulk of the overcast sky, streak the horizon like yellow satin ribbons.

The girls strip their clothes and sprint to the water.

We set up, sit down and watch the girls romp and play and wave us into the water, "C'mon, the water isn't that cold!" they shout from the breaking waves.

"I don't know Rob, it looks pretty cold. What do you think?"

"I think you can do what you want but I am not going." This comment was expected. Rob is known to sit at the beach with a towel on his body or over his head. He doesn't like too much sun and despises the cold. I normally don't mind the cold, but today I am feeling a bit comfortable in my chair with my long sleeves on. The water looks clear and the girls are having fun, but then we spy little Clara who is standing 10 ft in from the edge shivering. She runs up to us and asks for a towel. "How is the water Clara?"

"Cold!"

"I don't know Rob, maybe 43 is the age that I say no to the cold and stay here in the chair where it is comfortable." There is always an age where one decides that they are too old to do something, anything. They just stop. I remember when my dad stopped body surfing with us. He must have been around 65. I would say it was about 10 years ago. My dad used to brag about being Papa Surf. He could ride the waves to the very end and his belly would scape against the sand. But one summer, he didn't swim with us anymore. Now matter how many times we asked him. It was sad, but we understood. My mom on the other hand, never stopped. She played in the surf in her 69th year, She played til the end

"No way, your going in the water for your birthday swim." my brother says playfully.

"Your not swimming!" I come back to him.

"That is me, not you. I know you! Your going to get in there, or I am going to throw you in there."

"No your not!", I say smiling

"Yes I am." he says, not smiling. Emma and Clara giggle.

The girls continue to beckon me from the the water. They charge the beach and come to the blanket for a chip and dip.

"Come in the water. It isn't that bad!" Lily says, but Lily swims now matter what. She is tough like I was, before I was 43.

"Girls go take Aunt Stacy in the water. She wants to go swimming." and I do. I really do but need some encouragement because of the conditions. "You take her with you, she wants to go."

With some encouragement, I strip off my long sleeves and march in a determined fashion towards the water. The girls march beside me escorting me to my gift to myself. The water was cold, breathtaking, and I don't mean beautiful, not at first, just cold. But then after a few minutes, the steel blue water began to warm my skin or hypothermia began to set in, what ever the reason I began to enjoy the swim. We jumped and laughed and rode in some waves and I was filled. I guess 43 wasn't the age I said no more! Thanks Rob, for being there for me and encouraging me and making my birthday memorable. You have always been there for me. I feel loved.

I Love You!

TMI

Is it me, or are doctors starting to sound like those commercials that we see on TV for drugs that pharmaceutical companies peddle. You know the kind: A woman in her sixties is riding her bike with her grandson. She suffers from arthritis but when she started taking ________, she feels great. Now she can knit, play thumb wars, ride a horse, play the harp, garden, rock climb, but, then come the side effects: "if you take this you may suffer from dry mouth, phantom itching, dandruff, enlarged nostrils, club foot, excessive nose hair, scaly skin, an over bite, and on and on and on. Do you recognize the commercial?

While the music rolls on, the commercial nauseatingly spews rapid fire side effects, cataloging every possible scenario to protect the consumers health;), or more importantly the drug company from possible law suit. Come on people, we know what is going on, don't we. That is why we don't really listen to that part of the commercial anymore. They are right up there with the warnings we get on kids toys, "This Big Wheel is not to be ridden on the freeway or on any thoroughfares where traffic may be present." Really? Do we really need to be reminded of this? Can we not save the ink and lower the cost of the toy a penny or two? I find it funny, I think we all do, and a little sad at the same time, that money has to be wasted in product development and marketing to warn the general public of things that we know by our common sense, to be true. This is what we like to call TMI (Too Much Information.) We are inundated with information, whether it be in commercials, the internet, facebook, blogs and now the doctors office!

First let me set this up. My eldest is rapidly approaching his 19th birthday and in our church, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, a young man has the option of choosing to go on a mission at age 19. In order to get this done he must do a series of tests, doctors visits, dental visits which include wisdom teeth extraction. He has been reticent about the latter. After a series of discussions in which Mitchell flatly refused getting it done, I came to find out that he had a friend who had his wisdom teeth extracted and suffered a great deal of pain. We calmed his fears and let him know that the pain was minimal and that he would be fine, and he was until. . .

Dr D., a fine looking doctor in his mid thirties, bursts into the room in his white coat, blonde hair and perfectly polished teeth. He shakes our hands vigorously and says, "Well, let's see what we have here. Your coming in for your wisdom teeth."

"Yes," Mitchell responds quietly

"Do you have any pain or discomfort?"

"No."

"All right, let's look at the x-rays." This is when he begins pointing to the x-ray and telling what he sees. He points to each quadrant of the x-ray showing the teeth that need to be extracted. "Oh I see your missing one on the lower left quadrant. That's good because the bottom can be more painful. What do we have here?" Dr. D. raises an eyebrow and shifts into higher gear. "This lesion, this substance, this form that we see here may be of some concern, or it could be just some phantom abstraction that shows up on the film, or it could be something, but you don't have any pain or discomfort? then it is nothing to worry about, what we would need to do is biopsy it and see if it is something, but it could be nothing, but I would watch it, don't worry about it."

This is where I speak up and say, "Huh?" only I do it in a more lady like manner, you know, like, "What is it your describing?" But really my brain and my emotional state is,"huh?"

Again he goes into what it could be, "a lesion, a cyst, a growth, it could be benign, could be normal, could be abnormal, could be normally abnormal bone structure, because your face is not parallel, If we were to cut your face in half, you would see that it is not parallel." Now Mitchell is looking at me and we are both going, "huh?"

"I wouldn't worry about it, but you may want to talk to your dentist and watch it and pay attention to see if you are getting any pain or discomfort."

Right about then I started to get some pain and discomfort.

After looking at older x-rays from Dr. Gray, and seeing the abnormality has not changed, he assured us it was probably nothing and that we should just watch it, not really be concerned, but pay attention to it. . . and on and on and on.

"Okay, lets take a look here," Dr. D. says as he pulls on his rubber gloves, snap, snap!! Dr. D. inspects Mitchell's mouth, assures me that he sees nothing out of the ordinary here, and then returns to the x-ray.

"So this is what I am going to do," I figured he would give a brief explanation, I was wrong, "I will chip away at the bone in order to get the tooth out. It is here that I will use my mallet and chisel." I look wide-eyed at Mitchell, who sits in the chair and seems unaffected. Phew!

I didn't know anything about a mallet and chisel when I got my wisdom teeth taken out back in 1984? Is this some new procedure? Is this some throw back to the dark ages of medicine? Is this for real? As Dr. D. continued to explain the process of extraction, I began to wonder if it was really necessary for my son to have his wisdom teeth taken out.

"You will be feeling a lot of pain. The pain stems from cutting away the bone to get the teeth extracted. There will be a lot of swelling."

"Yes, but the pain isn't that bad right? It doesn't last that long. . ."I reassure Mitchell.

"Well I like to tell the truth. I don't want you getting any false impressions. It will be painful." He is right about that, he does like to be truthful about EVERYTHING.

"Sometimes we may need to cut the tooth into two parts. This way we can take the tooth out with out chipping too much bone. It is the cutting into the bone that causes so much pain later on. We even cut the tooth into four pieces. We do what ever we need to do to get the job done." He was talking about my son's mouth like it was some destruction site

Dr D. continues informing us of possible problems that can occur during the procedure. "When entering into the lower quadrant, there is a nerve that runs down the jaw and this is what gives your chin and cheek feeling and your tongue the sense of taste. While making the incision to extract the tooth, this nerve can become severed. It can cause numbness for a few hours or permanently, so sometimes I will go in the inside of the jaw, but sometimes the nerve can be there too." I am left wondering if the only possible outcome is for my son to suffer permanent nerve damage.

All the while Dr. D. is smiling and affirming that yes these things are normal. " So do you have any questions for me?"

"No, no, no questions here. You've done an excellent job describing EVERY thing. I especially liked your description of the mallet and chisel," I say smiling, but really protesting.

Yes I protest! TMI

Maybe I am old fashioned, but I don't want to hear about all the tools and possible problem scenarios. Give me one of the old doctors who says "bring 'er in and let's get 'er done!" I have more confidence in them. I have no reason to think that this doctor is incompetent, he was referred to me by my orthodontist, who is exceptional, but all his attention to possible problems lends me an uneasy feeling.

In the end I reviewed what I KNEW about wisdom teeth extraction:

"Mitchell, what will happen is that you will come into the office with wisdom teeth, fall asleep, walk out with out them, and then take it easy for a couple of days as your mouth heals. You will have discomfort for a few days. Is this correct Dr. D?"

"Yes that is correct."

"Then when can we get him in here and get 'er done?"

Ice Cream For Dinner

Baskin Robbins Ice cream for .31 cents a scoop?

Oh yeah baby, we are all over it.

When I was a kid, we didn't eat out that often. When I was a kid, a trip to McDonald's, Bob's Big Boy, or In and Out, was a very special treat. When I was a kid, dinners were in most every night. In my early years, we sat around the plaid Formica table in my parents kitchen and ate home cooked meals like pinto beans, that my mom would stew all day long, garnished with sour cream and cheese, why that image comes to mind so strongly baffles me. I didn't particularly care for the beans, but I often think about them and connect them to the kitchen of my childhood. I remember coming home on a winters evening and smelling the beans and walking into the dimly lit kitchen and seeing my grandma's huge aluminum pot shining under the hood light like a museum exhibit. I can see the placard placed next to it, it would read: Here in lies Judy's beans, she got the recipe from a Relief Society weekday meeting about nutrition. She serves them often.

"We are having beans again?" I would say in a flat tone.

"They are so good for you!" My mom would say with a smile. I don't remember complaining about them, but I do remember forcing them down. I think it was at this early age that I made the discovery that if it was good for you it didn't necessarily taste good. But she cooked other things too. Other very tasty things like Chicken enchiladas, stuffed cabbages, flank steak, shishkabobs, tacos, the ground beef kind with a Dr. Pepper on the side.
"I want some Dr. Pepper!"

"Your too young." my mom would say. I surveyed the table and saw that my older brother and sister, who are nine and ten years older than me have one.

"What about them?" I said complaining.

"It isn't good for your teeth." I did have a lot of cavities as a kids but it wasn't because of soda because I never got it.

"When you get older you can have one." she says laying down the law. Why is that? Do your teeth all of a sudden get stronger when you are older. Do our bodies do a better job metabolising caffeine when we are older? Isn't it just as important to take care of your bodies as an adult as it is as a kid. I don't know but I now use the same logic with my kids. The point is, we never ate out so when we did it was really memorable.

I remember one particular time we were able to eat out and have dessert out on the same day. I don't remember why, but I remember being told while we stood at the counter at Baskin Robbins that I could get three scoops. Three whole scoops. I remember bouncing up and down and traversing the counter looking at all the ice cream that they had to offer. What to choose? I am sure I chose the standby chocolate chip, chocolate mint and some other fail proof choice that would guarantee yummy goodness. My brother, the yidda guy, on the other hand was an adventurer when it came to trying new things. He still is. I remember one time in particular, we had an Italian family over for Christmas Eve dinner. In Italy, it is customary to have fish on Christmas Eve, so our Christmas Eve meal was spaghetti with crab marinara, and oysters, the raw kind. I barely had the courage to eat the crab marinara( crabs were like big water bugs to me, not very appetizing) But my brother was sucking those raw oysters down like there was no tomorrow. When Rob chose his three scoops, he chose, and I remember exactly: licorice, pumpkin pie and bubble gum.

What an event. Three whole scoops of ice cream of our very own, each scoop piled up one on top of the other like the leaning tower of Pisa.

So Wednesday, after the primary activity, I offered the Baskin Robbins deal to my kids: "So, what do you say, do you want ice cream for dinner?"

"What? "Lily says, incredulously, "Are you serious?" she doesn't believe me because I am notorious for making the kids finish their dinner before they get dessert, and she is usually one that is negotiating how many bites she has to eat before she can have some.

"Yes, I am serious. Shall we do it? Shall we have ice cream for dinner?"

"YES!" all three cheer. "Ice cream, ice cream, ice cream," through the open windows.

When we got there the line was out the door. I wanted to get there as soon I could, thinking that the line would only get longer as the evening progressed. It only took about 30 min before we were served.

What was every ones dinner choice?
Emma: chocolate chip, bubble gum, chocolate mint.
Lily: Strawberry cheesecake, chocolate mint, chocolate chip.
Owen: two scoops of cotton candy.
And for me, the old standby, chocolate chip with chocolate peanut butter, and cookie dough. Mitchell got the same as me as he was not there to choose himself. All five dinners for only $ 4. 89. The deal of the year.

A new tradition.

I can't help but notice that Lily and Emma are both eating their ice cream by tilting their spoon upside down. My father and my sister and I do the same thing. I find it curious. Is it because our tongues can't wait for the ice cream so we subconsciously plant it on our tongues first so we can get that taste asap. Is it because we want to scrape every last drip off the spoon before going in for another bite, or is it some type of genetic trait like being able to do a taco tongue or having our ear lobes attached as opposed to detached. Really, curious minds want to know.

Whether we ate our ice cream with our spoons up or down, I am confident we were all satisfied.