Monday, December 8, 2008

Lullabye Legacy

I've mentioned before that if I could, I would sing a solo in Sacrament meeting. I would sing my heart out if I could. . . and I would if I didn't mind making people uncomfortable, which I am sure would happen. People would pretend to be listening intently, they may even smile, but the smile would be a way for them to control their laughter. Really, I am not being humble or fishing for compliments, or any such thing. I know what I can do and singing a solo just isn't it. I got soul, but I can't sing, and that's okay. I remember one time when I was teaching a group of Stars at the time, (four year old primary children). It was our first ward out of college in Sacramento CA. I prepared to sing them a song as a part of the lesson. There they sat in a semi circle, their sweet little faces were reverently watchful as I began to sing the song. When I finished, smiling, all the kids smiled back at me. . .I asked them if they would like me to sing it to them again, to which they responded, shaking their heads, with a resounding, "No" All of them were in agreement. They might have liked the song, but they didn't like me singing it. Which is okay. I love the honesty of children.

But you know what, every night my children want me to sing to them. And I do, unashamedly. I sing my solo and they listen contently. All of my children have been serenaded to sleep as tiny babies and then into their toddlerhood. Every night I get to sing my heart out to my little ones and they love it. They even ask for encores. . .Pure joy for me.




My sweet William, being six, still wants me to sing, and in particular the same song every night. He calls it the flower song "Sing me the flower song." I've mentioned before that I have made attempts to sing other songs and he has flatly refused. I respect a man who knows what he wants and asks for it. . . so I have obliged him these last 6 years.




However, I want to be challenged. I think I have mastered the flower song. In fact I think that I could actually get up in Sacrament and sing that song and actually get away with it. So in my efforts to find other options, I remembered a song by James Taylor called "Close Your Eyes" that I sang to my eldest child, Mitchy the Kid, who is now 18, and I thought that I should try to sing that to William. He liked it. Who wouldn't really.

The next night, William began singing it at the dinner table, and I picked up and started singing with him to help him with the lyrics

Well, the sun is slowly sinking down, and the moon, it surely rises,
And this old world will still be spinning round,
And I Still Love You!

So close your eyes, you can close your eyes, its alright,
I don't know no love songs, and I can't sing the blues anymore
but I can sing this song, and you can sing this song,
when I am gone.

It won't be long before another day,
And we're gonna have a good time,
and no ones gonna take that time away,
and you can stay as long as you like

So close your eyes, you can close your eyes, it's alright,
I don't know no love songs, and I can't sing the blues anymore,
but I can sing this song, and you can sing this song,
when I'm gone.

To which my oldest, who is now a man, and who I swear has never heard that song since he was a baby in his crib, said urgently, "What's that song? No, really, who sings that song? I've heard that song before?" I was astounded by his reaction. We don't have that song on tape, cd, itunes or any such thing, so he has not experienced it recently, that I know of. I smiled as I looked at his reaction and realized it was my singing of that song that he remembered. His urgency to place the song made me realize it was coming from a distant part of his mind, but he wanted to recall it, to bring it back to the fore front, and wouldn't we all want to be able to remember those softly serene moments of security and safety. Wouldn't we all want to recall and relive those times that bring us peace and love. I would imagine it was like seeing a favorite children's book that was read to you as a child. This happens to me when I see illustrations of old books that I had long forgotten. I get this wave of emotion and memory, more than nostalgia, I can't explain it. Some of my fondest memories are of my mother reading to me, especially, chapter books. As the story progressed, we would share the experience together. I smile when I think about it.

That night I got on the internet and began searching other lullabies that I can sing to my kids. I found a great website that plays the melodies of some of the lullabies (something I need)Click here if you want the the site. I have two new ones that I am working on right now: "All Through the Night," and "All The World Loves to Hear Mothers Sing" I need to remind myself of the melodies every night, but gradually these too will be part of my repertoire. These lullabies will sink deep into their sweet souls and hopefully they won't forget them. Hopefully they will remember them and sing them to their babies one day. This is my hope, to create a legacy of lullabies.

8 comments:

Allison said...

AAAAHHHH, what a sweet post! It brought back memories of us singing Sweet Baby James (also the amazing James Taylor) to little James and even now when that song comes on the radio, the kids all hush each other reverently and say. . .James it's your song. . . and it is all I can do to not start bawling.. . . "Deep greens and blues are the colors I choose!" Love you stacy!!

Stewarts said...

So sweet Stacy, I got chills reading this one. I too am on the side that sings only with a large group. But I will sing to or with my children whenever! Aren't kids the best. They never judge. They don't care if your off tune or even if you completely change the words to a Lullaby because you have know idea what the next line is. You are their mother and they love you unconditionally. It is a wonderful gift we have been given. Thanks for this post.

Scott & Adie said...

You are the apple of my eye - that's why I'll always be around. Stevie Wonder.

I sang it to all three kids. I have memories of holding them, dancing and singing in the front yard of a few of our homes. Something about being outside under the trees, feeling the breeze, made me want to sing that to them.

I'm so glad you're treasuring the moments because boy do they go fast. (deep sigh)

Cheri' said...

When Lexie was little I used to sing her a hymn in Portuguese. She always wants me to sing it still to this day! We were trying to plan something for Dylan's birthday and he was going over who he wanted to invite. Of course Will was on the list with 3 other kids. I tried to explain that we live a little far to come just for a birthday. We are missing you guys!

Marcie said...

Stacy!!! I'm so glad that you found us! I love how eloquent you are in your writing. It makes me smile and takes me back to when I would sing to Kennedy every night...I Love to see the Temple. She started to sing it with me at such a young age and I wish I would've recorded her doing it. It's amazing what music can do to your soul! We miss you guys. I think of you often remembering when I was in primary and Mitch wanted to comment during my sharing time and all he could think to say is, "Ya, well my mom has a baby in her tummy!" So cute...I really can't believe that he is 18!!! We're getting old aren't we?!!

Claire Stowell said...

I wish I had the confidence to sing to my kids. I hate to hear myself sing even, so I don't do it. I have always admired your sweetness and time you take with each of your kids. You are a great blogger. So intelligent and creative.

Love you,

Claire

Liz said...

So sweet Stacy and I love your insight. When I sing to Hailey she thinks I am the best singer in the world, or maybe its more of a confused-thats a horrible voice mommy look, but regardless she loves it. And I lover her. Somehow it makes you closer to your kids and you love them all much more everyday! They think you are amazing and no matter what you do you do it better than any other mommy. Keep singing and perhaps you can share that lullaby website, that would be neat to look at and learn as well. Love ya and thanks for your sweet words!

Quarantine Coronacation said...

Thanks for all your responses. I have loved reading your responses and hearing about your lullabye experiences.

I have added the link to my post!

Enjoy!